I’ve been thinking about this for a long time. Most bloggers that I follow are homeschoolers. They often post things I could never even begin to understand, since I am a public schooler. True this was a tad on the dramatic side, but who really cares? It was fun to write.
So I decided to make a post about an Average day here at school…
8:00~Free For All
You slam your backpack down on the side of your classroom, kicking other student’s to the side, piling up. You nervously creep up to the blacktop, and scan it with burning eyes, searching for your friends.
You saw their backpacks by their classes, so you knew they were here.
You dart in between an intense four square game, getting scolded by a fifth grader, who tries to kick you.
Then, you sprint across a the basketball court, while the players are occupied on the other side. You take a deep breath as you see your friends on the opposite side of the field, they had already made their perilous journey…. A Frisbee hits you. Man down, Man down! , screams your brain, as you fall to the grass. Kids laugh. You awkwardly stand up, and then just 5 feet away from your friends, some jerk kicks a soccer ball at your head on purpose. You stumble to them, barely conscious.
8:30~The beginning, the sanctuary
You line up in your alphabetical ordered spot, and sling your stuff on your back.
The line leader is worshiped, and he takes a few dramatic seconds… and calls the other line inside first. How dare he?
The teacher abruptly cuts off all the chatter, and demands you get a book out, so you do. The students around you pull out their beginning 35 page chapter books, and you get out your hardcover limited edition copy of Jane Eyre, a classic. This is your sanctuary.
9:00~ MATH. (Dun, dun, DUN!)
Above is the fox that teaches us algebra. Our class named him Delvin. So Delvin explains to us how to calculate the area of a 20 sided polygon, statistics, and algebra. Though sometimes it’s in a woman voice, and other times in a man voice, which is very confusing.
Otherwise, math is OK. I like math, because it’ challenging to me.
BUT THEN I MET JIJI THE PENGUIN.
Jiji the penguin made me hate penguins. He is my nemesis, and he makes everything so darn confusing.
I don’t know much about penguins, but I know they can jump so…
First, you enter this long drawn out password you can remember, because they drill it in our heads in the beginning of the year. (Mine is the horse thing in this one, but I’m also the kangaroo, the milk, the grass, the fishing pole, the feet, and a bunch of other stuff.
This is the level I failed over 10 times. See those little dots at the very bottom? Those are the times I have failed this level. The point is to make the worms meet so they can drop their seed in that little pot thing at the bottom. how is this even math?
And then the penguin gives you the meanest look in the whole wide world.
So that’s Jiji math for ya’!
11:05~Prepare to explode with boredom
This is language arts. the students take turns reading aloud, and stumbling across words like “duck”. Then, we take a spelling pre test, and I’m the only one that passes it. My brain explodes with boredom
12:40~Scavenge for food
If you have a pack of gum, you’re done.
“Can I have some gum?”
“You gave her gum, give me some!”
And then the whole table rips your gum apart live savage wolves eating their prey.
This is lunch time, where the poor souls that have hot lunch are forced to eat moldy grilled cheese that is packaged and warmed up so it’ll burn your fingers.
1:30~There’s a way out
The teacher lectures you on all the jiji you haven’t finished this week, and then you give her a superior look, take your clarinet, and run out to the band room. You pump your fists on the way out
Students line up on one side of the field, gazing anxiously at the other end. The teacher hits the play button on his stereo and a cheery woman’s voice echoes throughout the open field. She explains the rules as the children break a sweat. Get to the other side before the beep sounds out. Simple, correct? I think not.
“Ready, Begin, in 5….4….3….2…..1!”
The beep sounds, and the students jog to the other side, with 5 seconds in between each beep. Each time you get to the other side, the woman calls, “Level one completed.”
You cheer for yourself in your head, but you have no idea what’s coming next. This isn’t too hard, you think. Next comes Level 7. Level 8. Within each beep, the interval between shorten, and you’re sprinting as fast as humanly possible to the other side. You hit it with your foot, and the beep plays again, just in time. You turn, and run to the other side. Your throat is on fire an your legs feel like jelly. One of the girls crawls over to the instructor, embarrassed. After finally seeing at the first to fall, other students begin to join in, like a stampede. Clutching their throats they bail out of the test. One girl is crying, You’re not quite sure if that boy on the ground is alive or not. 2 friends left for the water fountain and have been there for over 20 minutes. They are not expected back anytime soon. The students that quit are forced to sit there and watch the kings of the school, who are on Level 100, Level 120. The field erupts in a cheer as the last girl in Cross Country gives up, she’s worshiped, she is a legend.
The students drag their useless bodies to their lines, and line up for class.
This isn’t even an exaggeration.
You wave goodbye to your friends, and rush out of the gates.
YOU ARE FREE! SAMMY IS FREEE!
(somebody get that reference. 😄 )
Did you enjoy reading this? Do you go to public school or homeschool? Let me know in the comments below!